Three Engaged Couples Share What Love Means To Them

All the mushy stuff that you’re always curious to hear but might not get a chance to ask.

What is love? Aside from it being a question posed by way too many cheesy 80’s pop songs, it’s the question on the minds of many on Valentine’s Day.

Who better to answer that question than three couples getting married this year? They must be doing something right if they got this far.

I reached out to three of my engaged couple-friends and asked to hear their love story. How did you meet? When did you know they were the one? What does love mean to you?

All the mushy stuff that you’re always curious to hear but might not get a chance to ask.

Warning: Their answers might just melt your heart.

Katrina and Dane

How long have you been together?

Dane: We’ve been together since March 30, 2012, so we’re almost hitting 7 years.

How did you guys meet?

Katrina: We actually met first at Frosh where new students get introduced to the university. My mom and dad were like, “You can’t have a boyfriend until you finish university,” in typical Asian parent style. But here I am, first week into school, and I meet the person I will end up marrying.

Dane: I didn’t really start seeing Katrina until after Frosh. She was volunteering for one of her classes selling candles. I saw her there and learned she was studying for her Math final.

Katrina: I told him I was having a hard time with Calculus and he offered to help tutor me. We exchanged numbers, but … I never texted him back.

Dane: I got ghosted!

Katrina: Fast forward to three months later and I needed a job. My parents were like, “We can no longer afford to pay for everything.” So there I was, applying for everything at the mall, and I apply to The Source, where Dane worked! He recognized my name from a list of applications online.

Dane: I actually ended up interviewing her.

Katrina: He hired me for my first job during university. After that we saw each other a lot because we worked in the same store and hit it off. I like to say it was meant to be because we kept crossing paths for no reason. Having ghosted somebody you’d think you’d never meet each other again [laughs].

What makes them special to you?

Dane: I think Kat is very sweet. Not just with me but with everybody that she meets. She cares about the people she spends time with.

Katrina: He is very patient. Not just with me, it’s with everybody he knows. And because he’s so patient, you feel really loved.

What does love mean to you?

Dane: It means really caring about each other, accepting the differences, and just really wanting the best for each other. Love in the beginning is a feeling, but over time it’s a partnership. You’re on the same team for life.

Katrina: For me, love means having an undying respect for someone. Not thinking that they do no wrong. It’s understanding that they can do wrong, but still respecting them despite that. You will forgive and compromise with them to make it work.

Imrahn and Nida

How long have you been together?

Nida: It’s been a little short of 2 years.

How did you guys meet?

Nida: We met on Tinder. I was very selective – he was only the second person I met from the app. We went to Starbucks in Metrotown and he was late for our first date!

Imrahn: I was new to the city! I got lost.

Nida: I was like, “Who gets lost in the parking lot of Metrotown?”

When I first saw him approaching I thought he was a little nerdy looking, but after talking to him, I knew this could be long-term. I said to myself I was going to get married to him after the first date [laughs].

Imrahn: I told her that I cooked all these Indian recipes. I thought it would impress her. She was hooked, I could tell.

Nida: Yeah, sure [laughs].

One of the first things I said to him was that if he wasn’t serious, he should let me know and we could end it. I made it very clear.

Imrahn: I was looking for the same thing so that drew me to her, that she was so upfront.

Nida: I know people raised in Western culture like to go on several dates before they say anything serious. I didn’t want that. But I had to be careful with what I said so he wouldn’t run away! I was trying to play it cool, but he saw right through me.

What makes them special to you?

Imrahn: I love when I can make her laugh. The reaction I get is such a positive glow. I love when she laughs and smiles and we joke. That’s my favourite thing, just to see her face. I love to see her smile.

Nida: He’s very easy to talk to and supportive. There’s not a lot of people out there who want to genuinely listen and solve your issues even when you’re down in the dumps. Because you can get other things from people like friendship, but having someone genuinely listen and help you through everything? That’s what I like.

What does love mean to you?

Imrahn: I think love means being yourself with another person. You know for a fact that they accept you for who you are and you don’t have to pretend or anything.

Nida: It’s being able to feel comfortable with who they truly are, not how they act. And it’s not easy to be comfortable with other people.

Imrahn: It’s very hard to live with another person and accept their messiness.

Nida: Like my trees of hangers [laughs].

Imrahn: It’s very hard to let something into your life completely, and if you can do that, that’s how you know.

Photo credit: Mathias Fast

Jan and Esther

How long have you been together?

Jan: Eight years this year.

How did you guys meet?

Jan: Over summer 2011 during the Vancouver Canucks playoffs. The same summer as the riot.

Esther: I normally don’t watch hockey at all, but the playoffs were an excuse to socialize with people.

Jan: I felt like she laughed at my jokes a lot and to me it was important that people find me funny [laughs]. I’m kidding that’s not my thing, but it caught my attention.

Esther: That contradicts my first impression. He was making these jokes that were kind of weird and I didn’t think you were that funny [laughs].

It all just happened at once. No one asked each other out. We just kept hanging out in smaller groups until it was just us.

What makes them special to you?

Esther: You can always cheer me up if I’m feeling grumpy [or] if I’m having a bad day. I just come home and you’re there to cheer me up and make me feel better.

Jan: I like that you’re a super positive person. I know that some days you have bad days, yet somehow you have such a positive outlook around it. You always have a way of telling your bad days in a funny or cheerful way.

What does love mean to you?

Esther: It’s someone who can cheer you up and cheer you on.

Jan: It’s you. It’s everything about you. I feel like my feelings for you are so hard to really express in a way that will resonate with other people. It’s the eight years we’ve spent together that’s been wonderful. Our relationship just keeps getting stronger and stronger.

At the same time, I think even without the relationship we’re just good friends on a day-to-day basis. Take the romance away and we’re really good friends underneath and that’s what keeps us going. I might say that’s what love is.

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